Out Into the Big Bad World.

I am sure that you can all remember a time when you were picked on in some way or another at school or somewhere else. This has always been a fear for me as a parent. Well, this fear came true today.

This evening I was trying to get Matt to put his coat on so he could go with his dad to a mutual activity. They were going to rake leaves for some people in our ward as a service project. As I was trying to get Matt to put his coat on he kept resisting, saying it was too big.(It's by no means to big, just a warm winter coat.) I told him that it is cold outside and he needed his coat to keep warm while they raked leaves. Suddenly he broke down crying and said, "It's too big. Someone at school called me a fatty!"( I know some of you are laughing but it wasn't funny to me.) I pulled him into my lap fighting back tears of my own. Not that it is a big deal but obviously this really bothered him. I hated to see him cry. I've never really seem him cry because of what someone else said. Of course the kid who said this didn't even have a coat on. He is one of those I'm too cool to wear a coat when the temperature is the the high 40's.

I tried to think of what I could say to him. I kind of fumbled around a bit trying to think of something that could be beneficial and help him feel better. I told him that some people say mean things because they don't feel good about themselves so they put other people down. I told him he was smart for wearing a coat when it is freezing outside. This probably was no consolation to him. I know that things like this will happen again because it just does. Who hasn't had something mean said to them? Probably nobody. My thought was, "How can I build him up so he can handle these experiences that no doubt will come periodically in life?"

I guess there was another friend with Matt that got called the same thing because of his coat. It's hard not being able to be there but I know that's part of growing up. He needs to experience things himself without me being there to be his body guard 24/7. Luckily this isn't a constant thing for him. It sounds like it was just some punk kid who probably is like this with everyone and decided to pick on Matt and his friend at that particular moment.

I know this story isn't so bad and could be kind of comical because it's not really a big deal. It just reminds me that life isn't always easy and my kids are going to have to experience things that are hard and sometimes hurtful and I can't be there to stop it all. At least I can be at the crossroads right? I can be there when they come home to comfort or be a listening ear and reaffirm to them who they are and how special they are. I am sure I will look back on this and chuckle, but in the moment it was hard to see him embarrassed and hurt. It was a reality check for me that he has to go through life and experience things for himself, good and bad. It's hard to let go of the idea that I can protect him from everything. I guess all I can do is be there to put the band aid on for him. I know there are those reading this that can sympathize with me and remember that first moment when your child came home crying because of someone else. I'm sure you remember how it broke your heart. All I can think is, "Welcome to the Big Bad World!" A little dramatic, I know. However it did feel a little bit like that in the moment.